30 Mar Making Friends As An Adult: What’s Stopping You?
When we were in kindergarten, most children would be able to go up to one another and instantly be labeled as “best friends”. Why can’t adult relationships be as easy?
Many people attribute lack of trust to the reason why adults don’t make friends easily. Psychology Today says that introversion, fear of rejection, pragmatic concerns, lack of time, and pickiness also play a factor. Now, what does this look like in real life? Here are some examples:
Introversion: “Others should take the first step”.”
Fear of rejection: “What if they won’t like me after getting to know me?”
Pragmatic concerns: “I have a health problem that prevents my socializing.”
Low trust: “What if they’re only friends with me for an alternative reason?”
Lack of time: “Work is too busy and I have no time for friends.”
Pickiness: “Their values don’t directly align with me.”
Because of all of the obligations of adulthood and the impacts of the current pandemic, friendships can go by the wayside. To combat this, there are a few steps we can take in the right direction. It’s hard to make friends if you’re not open to it. With this, accept that invitation to go out after work and make an effort to continue a friendly relationship. Living close to your friends and having similar tastes, interests, and viewpoints also make a difference. One should also assess their reservations and use them to create the relationship that will be valuable for all parties involved. Understanding what you want in a friend and being the friend that you want is also important.
Overall, friends are made in many ways and in different atmospheres. Though it might not be as easy as when you were 5, it is still possible to make friends as an adult!
Here are some more ideas on ways to create connections.
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By: Grace O’Neill